Mary and I now enjoy all the contentedness we once had, but thought was gone for good.
How / What Sufferers Think
- They study themselves constantly and are always aware of what is taking place within themselves (how they feel).
- They look at others and think: "Why can't I be like them?" Or: "Why can't I be the person I used to be before all this happened?"
- They look at others around them getting on with their lives and it's this contrast that can make them feel very alone.
- They have two voices in their minds:
- The voice of doubt suggesting the worst might happen: For example, that they will faint, collapse, have a heart attack, not be able to continue breathing, die, lose control or go crazy.
- The voice of panic that is desperately trying to tell them that they are going to be all right, but it never convinces them.
- They live in three time zones:
- The present, thinking how terrible they feel.
- The past, remembering how long they have been in this state.
- The future, thinking: "What if I can't recover, how am I going to cope with the rest of my life in this terrible state?"
- They put on an act in front of those around them, trying to make out there is nothing wrong and sometimes think: "How much longer can I hold on before I fall apart and perhaps make a fool of myself in front of others?" (very exhausting)
- In their worst moments they may think: "I feel so overwhelmed by all of this, that the struggle is becoming or has become too much; I am losing the will to carry on struggling."
- Sometimes they may have moments of "Inner Peace" and think: "Now this is me, if only I could stay like this for the rest of my life, I would be all right." They try desperately to hold on to these moments, but they always go, so they despair once more and think: "I cant see any way out of this"
This is how sufferers think. However, they do not know that what they are experiencing is probably the biggest bluff they will ever come across in their lives.
They have been bluffed by their thoughts and feelings of the moment into reacting the wrong way to them. They have not been painted into a corner that they cannot get out of. The truth is, it is bewilderment and fear of the state they are in that is keeping them in this state. There are three questions sufferers need to have answered:
- "Why Am I Like This?"
- "How Do I Recover?"
- "How Do I Stay Recovered So That I Never Go Back Into That State Again?"
Finally and in other words: